I am Divyaa and I am a Certified Positive Discipline Parent Educator. I feel honored to be a member of the Positive Discipline Association. I am equally honored and blessed to be the mom of 2 wonderful, creative, little humans (ages 9.5 and 6), who inspire me to be a better person (in other words, "keep me on my toes"!! :-)). In fact, becoming a mom gave me the courage and reason to shift lanes from being a Computer Science Engineer to becoming a student of Psychology. To elaborate, after working in the corporate world for 10+ years, the curiosity of the science behind development of every milestone of my kid, led me to take time out, to pursue Child Psychology. I also specialized in Positive Psychology.
Working as a teacher for preschool age children, helped me see the practical side of Child Psychology. The interaction with the parents, gave me an unique perspective to the varied dynamics of the parent-child relationship. And how different kids behave differently depending on the adults and circumstances in their immediate environment.
Personally also, I have always been intrigued by both the highs and lows of parenting. When I felt wowed by my child, I would feel proud and then also wonder, "what more does he need?". When I felt exasperated with my child, I wondered, "what am I doing wrong?". Both ways, I didn't feel connected with my kid.
This is when I discovered Positive Discipline - a parenting education program based on Individual Psychology. The tools in this program have been developed by Jane Nelson and Lynn Lott - trainers of Individual Psychology. This branch of Psychology is founded by Alfred Adler and developed by Rudolf Dreikurs - both Austrian psychologists, who pioneered parenting education and who studied the pre-adulthood development of a person determining the final nature of one's personality.
One of the many Adlerian concepts which attracted me was: "Adler believed that we all have one basic desire and goal: to belong and to feel significant." And that children's behavior: good or bad, is based on their idea of how to achieve belonging and significance in their environment.
The design of the positive discipline parenting classes made it possible for me to experience the world of my children and their feelings. Being equipped with brain based psychological tools, gave me the confidence that my parenting will be sustainable long-term. I enjoyed my children more, both through their highs and lows. I understood parenting is a skill, which is to be learnt and not just instinctive nor is it based on how one has been parented themselves. AND this is irrespective of the nature of the child. This was liberating. This feeling inspired me to want to empower other parents with this amazing philosophy. I got certified to teach this parenting methodology. And shared the Positive Discipline tools with the parents at the preschool. I witnessed positive changes in the kids at the preschool as well as in my own children.
Now, I wouldn't say, "Yay! I cracked it! My kids don't have meltdowns anymore! There are no sibling fights in our house! No mealtime fuss! They are perfect! I don't yell at my kids ever! I don't mess up! I am a perfect parent!". I wish :-) I still make mistakes and feel inadequate as a parent sometimes. Thanks to the positive discipline framework, I now know how to repair and approach the situation and my kids respectfully. I absolutely enjoy the journey much much more!!
There is more to parenting than disciplining or inviting cooperation or just staying afloat daily. The lives of our children are changing every day; it is up to us, as parents to be proactive in creating healthy, successful lives for our children. I would love for you to join me on this prodigious journey!